Posted by I feel I have made some progress on this gender role thing. Throughout I have openly stated that I would like to find a woman who will create a life with me. This is way more dubious than I thought. (“Dubious isn’t the right word, nor is “controversial.”) I have always thought that women and men can do the same things, even be the same if they wanted to. I still think this can happen but it is much more rare than I thought. I have been wrong. I have been hard-headed and stubborn.
I have met women who more or less fit this ideal of mine but for other, unrelated reasons it has not worked. They had a strong desire to have a successful relationship and be with a man (me); they had a can-do attitude, as well as a desire to put other (perhaps less conventional things for a woman) first. Perhaps I got hung-up on the wrong things.
For me the problem is that if I just put a normal profile out there I get all kinds of interest from a slew of women I am ambivalent about. Usually I try and communicate and it doesn’t work. I feel stress because we are at this tacit, ingrained impasse. I don’t want to stereotype or denigrate but I feel they are average; I believe they can have more but they don’t see it. They don’t have my ambition and they don’t get me; or, rather, they do but they just… The status quo is okay. It isn’t wrong it is just different: They are happy with the kids (in the past; now grown and gone, yet still of course family), parents, ex, neighbors, etc. life that is not me. I want to a) have a really close relationship and b) change the world.
I need to keep telling myself that. It isn’t wrong it is just different.
There has to be a better way to market to it.